He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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