There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
