I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
