I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Help. Why am I so naked?
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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