I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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