Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
