Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
