We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
