I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
