im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
