Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
