I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
NoShamevember. You game?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize