I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Randomize
