Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
he puts the penis in happiness.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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