Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
