I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize