I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
