I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
