i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
