One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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