I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
