Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Randomize
