Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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