I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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