OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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