p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
