Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
