So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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