I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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