Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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