just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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