Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I FOUND THE LEGS
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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