I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
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