You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
