Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
