you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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