there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
