Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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