I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
