another moral hangover. fuck.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
It's shark week go big or go home
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
