I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
