The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
