So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
