Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
