Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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