oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize