from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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