haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
