brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
