break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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