my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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