we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
