I can't watch pbs sober anymore
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
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