So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize